I am not in a good place today, yesterday either. The show is going ok. I've really only got one section running. Friday night Rolf and I sacked out and watched a couple of episodes of Mad Men, which I love. Saturday was good too. I had rehearsal in the afternoon. It took too long to get a couple of numbers up, but it was fun. I have some frustration with an actress who seems frustrated herself. But, again, it was fun.

Rolf and I had a nice evening that included some passion. Then I went out and bought new shoes, which I really needed. Then brought a late dinner home. We watched something on TV again. Glee, I think.

I did drink a lot on Saturday. Once I got home from getting the shoes, I drank a lot. Then Sunday I was just depressed. I finished off the vodka and seagrams 7 by the time I went to bed at about 10:30. Then overslept today, and just still feel depressed. I have a lot to do, work, and prep for tonight's rehearsal. So, I wish there was a magic pill to snap me out of it.

Music rehearsals have finally started for The Musical of Musicals: The Musical! I'm not really needed at those rehearsals, so I'm taking tonight and tomorrow night off. Tonight I'll work on blocking, tomorrow I'm going to go see a local professional production of the show. There's no denying that it will be very helpful to see the show again. Since we're doing a much different take on it, I don't think I'll be accused of copying them. I really do need to gain some insight to a number of things about the show. Especially the expository numbers. I don't know that my ideas of what to do with the cast in those areas are going to work. Plus, there are prerecorded sound cues that we were sent that I don't know where they go!

The professional production, by MetroStage, is brilliant. It is very heavily uses props and costumes, which we are not doing. Our production will have a very scant amount of costume changes, and almost no props. Now, how I make my show the funniest it can possibly be without those effects is a worry. I know it can be done because that's the way it was done originally. The original production had no props, no costume changes, and no set. And it was a hit. I'm trying to take it back to the original concept.

Trying to do this while in a depression is sickening. I hope I can break through.